Closing chapters

Being a rather cynical and somewhat pessimistic person I have learned through hard life lessons the importance of closing chapters in ones life so you can begin a new one. Over the past few months I was working hard on several chapters of companionship, dishonesty, doubting, and forgetting. Not very healthy at all but I wasn't open for any suggestions or listening to any warnings. Life then hit me hard.. right in the face, gut, and heart.. now I have been scrambling to regain my self efficacy, self esteem, confidence, trust, and forgiveness.. All throughout I have grown personally and emotionally. I have a deeper and richer understanding of friends, loyalty, and what is righteous.. I have not always made good decisions for myself and have hurt people along the way. In hindsight, I understand why life hit me in the face and what I need to do to move forward. Closure is an important aspect to complete to be able to move forward in your life. I have begun to forgive, ask for forgiveness, and make restitution to myself and those who were in between.. It feels peaceful to express your inner feelings and release the fear, anxiety, hurt, and let go of the what ifs in a simple gesture or small paragraph. I am not expecting anything in return but the act has given me a sense of being that I can move on and work through what is to come next with a sense of humanity, compassion, and integrity which I have previously ignored.. Life is good when you are good at life...

Still breathing along..

PS.. Mom is still hanging on.. She has had a couple of rough nights with fluid in her lungs but her strong heart and will have pulled her through. I am relieved she is still here but agonize over her current condition.