And here I go again on my own..

The traveling gnome is packing once again. I finally received my visa/passport and the go ahead to travel to India to complete the long anticipated adoption of Yamini. I am excited, worried, nervous, anxious, and exhausted with all the preparation and what ifs.. I wish they could just ship here (she's small and will fit into a large fed ex box).. maybe not right?!?

As I make plans for my students and partner teacher I am overwhelmed with kindness and excitement from all around. Work hasn't been a very safe and happy place to be at lately. I have been dreading driving here and hide in my classroom until it is time to go.. Its not the students nor the teachers (well maybe a few).. I have just been overwhelmed with everything and I cant seem to keep everything straight.. Excuses, excuses I know but I do not have anything else. I am ok with the possibility of not be offered another contract.. (I do plan to make noise about it; because I am a great teacher that affects positive change in my students lives).. I just want to be offered so I don't have to worry about what am I going to do next year.. I mean I do plan to apply in San Antonio, even if it is not in the education field, but use my masters to get a decent admin position in a different company.. My head is full of so many things the noise is deafening and tiresome.. (I just read what I wrote and my thoughts are all over the place) Too tired to edit anyways..

Red Tape..

As I am trying to prepare for my trip to India I have run into the perverbial government red tape. I sent my passport off in January for my visa which is a 7 day process. As of today, I have not received it. I was told today the consulate wants more paperwork regarding the adoption. I included the paperwork when I applied. I am beyond frustrated and my agency here is flustered. I am suppose to fly out on Sat. from Houston and have all my arrangements in Delhi already made. Now I have to wait for someone to review my application again and approve a visa.. Wait for someone to tell me I can finally depart on a journey long in waiting.. Wait again to be disappointed that this is not falling into place.. It reminds me of my last adoption journey. I wonder if this is a sign that this is not meant to be.. I am not to be blessed with a child or experience parenthood..

I just dont know anymore!